Memoir # 11 "Paradox & tough statistics"

There are many people that I know or that I am aquainted with that are struggling to grow their family the natural way.  One of the most difficlut paradoxes of all time for me is why can't some of the best people get pregnant when some of the worst people can give birth to more children than they can possibly care for?  I can't say for sure what I would do if I were in their shoes.  I probably would try some minimal fertility treatments but then if that failed I am pretty sure I would gear up for my next foster-adoption =D
To be honest, I have been so blessed in growing my family in this way that I would LOVE to do it again! 

It is not for everyone though and I sympathize with those who admit that they could never take a child into their home and love him to pieces only to have him reunited 10 months later with his birth parents.  This is something you may face if you choose to go this route.  According to the Michigan Foster Care Review Board in 2010, half of all children who enter foster care in MI are reunited with their birth parents.  This is on par with the national average which is also 50%.  So on average you have a fifty-fifty chance of adopting the child that comes into your home.  It really depends on the county that you live in or are working with though.  For example the county in MI we have worked with claims to have a 40% reunification rate/60% adoption rate so chances are a little better there.  I know that 50% isn't that high but compare it to some of the Infertility treatments out there and foster-adopt has them beat!

• Chlomid - 10-50% chance that taking it consistently will result in pregnancy
• In Vitro - 20-42% embryos placed resulting in pregnancy

(Statistics may vary based on age, donor eggs vs nondonor eggs etc. and results may be skewed because found on private infertility websites)

I want to clarify that there are a huge number of waiting children who are no longer in foster care and who are available to adopt.  These children for the most part are either African American (I hate this statistic right here because these kids are perfectly healthy), part of a sibling group that they do not want to split up (at this time), or they have special needs or disbilities.  These kids are waiting right now and if you have it in your heart to take one of them on, they are ready to come home to their forever family right now!

However, if you want to adopt a "happy healthy younger" child out of foster care, you need to foster a "happy and healthy younger" child first.  There is a high demand for children that do not have any significant issues, who are under the age of 5 years old, and are caucasian/asian/native american/latino.

Please keep reading and I will give you the statistics on this. In Michigan, 92% of children in foster care are adopted by either a relative or their foster parents.  Not a lot of kids are left over as you can see.

Second, 51% of all children in foster care in MI are under the age of 5.  Half of them are infant - 4 years old!!!  Where do all these kids go?  See above statistic...to their foster parents.

Anyway, in summary...foster to adopt is tough because it carries the risk of heartbreak but I have seen people have full funerals for their miscarriages so I think there is always a risk of heartbreak associated with trying to grown one's family - whichever way you choose to do it.  No matter which route you choose to go, remember that the statistics change significantly when you put your trust in God almighty..."For this child I have prayed, and the Lord has granted my request" 1 Samuel 1:27

Blessings for the week!